the flight of the fenix

He is here!

Finally! 40 weeks and 3 days after the chosen spermy penetrated the sanctity of the egg, we have Fenix Mateo Jarry!

He is here!

He burps, poos, pees, sleeps, eats, cries, and makes funny faces and I enjoy it and find it fascinating!!! The world is a different place now that my little man is a part of it. I feel more like a protector and a provider. I am a watcher and a warrior. I am more of a lover and a leader. When all is said and done, without his mom and I... lets just say that he needs us big time.

So I want to chat a little bit about the birth of this little guy. As you may know that the traditionally the birth of the phoenix is from the flames and the whole process takes three days. I can see a lot of parallels for my own little Fenix. We were in the hospital for three long days and his arrival probably could only have been more shocking than if he leapt from the flames! (slight exaggeration but it goes well with the story)

My wife went through a lot of pain. Her labor pains started days before we even got to the hospital. For three days leading up to our departure to the hospital, she could barely walk and was left fairly incapacitated. Once we were in the hospital there were all kinds of precautions that needed to be taken. Claudia had tubes running in and out of her. Literally! I mean literally, literally! She had so much clear tubing running out of her she looked as though she was trapped in Spiderman's web. Then when it came to the actualy labor she was pushing for over three and a half hours! She put Lance Armstrong to shame with that show of endurance. Our baby did not want to come out!

But there was that magical moment when we did. When his head popped out and the doctor turned and asked:

"Would dad like to deliver this baby?"

You have to understand that I never hold babies. They are too fragile and precious and a huge responsibility. You want to hold them, but you worry about dropping them. So now the doctor is actually asking me to catch this metaphorical crystal vase that is covered in slimy goo-ness to complicate things even further. So the guy that never holds babies is now stepping up to the plate. I am also not real good at dealing with other people's physical pains. When my wife was getting the epidural put in, I had to sit down (yeah, I was a wuss!). So now I am between her legs (a great place for all husbands to be and how we got into this situation in the first place) and the first person he sees and feels is me. I am not wearing any kind of apron or gloves, so I am covered in life giving slime. I felt like Bill Murray in Ghostbusters 1 when he first meets Slimer.

But I grabbed him, gave him to my wife, and burst into tears. The best present my wife or I ever got.

six days and counting!

preparing.for.fenix, originally uploaded by impactmatt.

Ok, yet another post about babies and my journey to becoming a daddy!

So, for mother's day I took my lovely Claudia to a tattoo parlour to get some body paint done on her belly. I wanted to her know how much I already consider her a mother even though we are technically missing the main component. The work that she has put in to take care of him though she has never met him is very impressive. The food she eats, the places she goes, the company she keeps... all revolve around our little one. I am not joking... you ever hear of slippery elm? Its a native american herbal secret for sore throats, however it also makes your uterus slippery... for those of you who have them. I find this incredibly amusing to think of my little baby shooting through the uteran canal at high speeds. I can imagine him like a little kid (which is what he is... my imagination is in overdrive..) screaming "WHEEEEEEEEEE!" as he plummets head first on the waterslide to life. A little more blood and sticky stuff though... So yeah, she takes very good care of him and is making preparations to make the birth as fun as possible for both her and the baby. Claudia works really hard at taking care of the baby and so I already consider her a mother. Hence, the mother's day trip to the tattoo shop.

She was very excited to have some work done as we look forward to getting something a lot more permanent soon. So we walk in for our appointment and we are greeted by our artist for the day who promptly advises us how hungover he is!!! Huh! So glad we aren't using any needles today! Now, a few days previous our painter had asked for images and sketches so that he would have something to work on and I sent them out promptly. Of course he didn't have them and fortunately I was able to pull them up from the email that I had sent from my inbox. So our hungover guy started working on sketching it out and about an hour later we were ready to go! Its fun sitting and waiting! So he gets to work and he advises us how nervous he is because he has never done any work on a pregnant woman before. He was sweating quite a bit and was freaked out when the baby decided to move and kick the canvas. He also told us stories from the tattoo parlour world. I felt like I was in an episode of "Montreal Ink." One tattoo guy just broke his wrist because he got into a fight with his present girlfriend's exboyfriend, right in front of the shop! Our artist told us about how he had to do some work on a woman's "titties" and how that made him nervous (the manager poked his head around the corner and advised him to use the word "chest" instead of titties to maintain a certain level of professionalism... too little, too late!) He also told us the stories of how he used to run in a gang in El Salvador and how he got shot and he had to move away to escape from it... I could keep going

But in the end it was a lot of fun and we chatted with him during the whole hour process of getting the artistic creation. It was a unique experience to have her belly tattooed and all these hardcore tattoo guys come by and say how cool it was that we were getting some work done. And then... as we head back down the street to the car this African guy stops us and talks all about pregnancy and motherhood and his experiences as a father and blesses us as we walk on. I love this city!

Anyhow... that is really all I have to say... no deep thoughts or nothing other than I am excited for the next week. I am excited to be a dad. I am excited to go through the whole process and be there for my wife and child. Love to hear from those of you with similar stories and have any advice or tales of your own.

standing room only...

preg.6, originally uploaded by impactmatt.

Ok... i have not posted anything in a while, basically because all my photography has been "work" related. I haven't been able to get out there and just take some shots on my own and enjoy it. Hopefully soon! But I have to get something up, so I am kicking it old school and bringing out a recent shot that I love.

This is my lovely wife just over a month ago and she looks sublime!!! (which is also a preferred music group of hers) To watch her stomach grow and to feel the life inside kicking out for life is the greatest gift I could imagine! I know the baby is aching to get out, but at the same time he is perfectly content in his little warm, safe world. I understand completely!! I feel like I go through that on a daily basis.

I love the comfort, safety, and pampering that I can receive from western society and the lifestyle that our world provides for us. I have my internet/facebook/fastfood umbilical high speed hook up that keeps me satiated and satisfied. And I guess that has some miniscule place in our lives. Because eventually, we leave our little womb and go out into the world. And when this happens we do not go quietly. There is pain, kicking, screaming, pushing, and professionals in white coats to collect us. Our lifeline is cut and we breathe our first gasp of air. (see Neo being taken out of the machine world in Matrix 1) So now we are out there and we are no longer safe and protected... even though we may have parents(some people don't get to meet theirs and I can't imagine how tough that is) to fend for us, we are now using our own immune systems to fight off diseases and viruses, our skin is shielding us from the UV rays, our lungs are trying to filter the air... its on us... and its not as safe.

But thats OK... we weren't made to live in the womb. We were made to live out in the world... out in the wild! Let us embrace it, let us make the most of it. Sure the womb would have been comfortable, but imagine life without your favorite friend, food, song, or memory. We are pampered, babied, and wombed (not a word, but you understand I hope) only for a short while to be able to take on the world and appreciate it!

Maybe thats another reason why people smile when they see that little baby doing baby things. We smile at how small and fragile they are. We ooh and ahh about their wide eyes and flailing limbs as they interact with our world. But I think we are impressed with this little person as they bravely adjust and learn with bright-eyed-eagerness about this beautiful world that they have a lifetime to discover.